Cherry is a new contributor to the XPN Junkie blog, and rather than just have her hop on and start posting, I figured a bit of an introduction was in order. So I put together a quick interview with her, to get the gritty facts and help welcome her to the hot mess that is XPN Junkie. Without further ado…
Welcome to XPN Junkie, Cherry!
S’up? Thanks for having me.
What brings you here?
Just trying to see what all the fuss is about. Used to game all the time before the consoles were online. But now it’s been sporadic, at best. People around me keep telling me I’m really missing out. So I figured, what the hell.
Why do you look so familiar?
Well I’m not the typical girly girl. So a couple years back I took my not-so-girly love of paintball and founded The Paintball Pinups Of Texas. The paintball community, much like the gaming community, is extremely male dominated. It is a regular sausage fest. I knew a handful of females that played around Texas. Literally 5! I wanted to showcase their/our femininity. So once a year we shed our paintball gear and get all purty for some impressive calendar shoots. It is a nice way to celebrate our softer side. We rarely have the opportunity at the field. Plus we get to hangout together! That is a rarity as well.
So, Cherry, let’s get down to the brass tacks here. You’re going to be a contributor to the XPN Junkie blog, and that means people are going to want to know about you. So I’m going to ask you some questions, and I expect honest, unfiltered answers. Are you ready?
Let’s go!
Okay. First off, boxers or briefs?
Underwear is for the weak
Commando it is, got it. I mean, I never mentioned who the boxers or briefs were for, but I’m shedding them as we speak.
You gotta be free. That’s all I’m saying. Not to mention I’m really into those athletic leggings. Underwear just doesn’t work there.
Free as a bird. Okay, so everybody loves pop culture, but everyone tends to gravitate towards one thing or another, be it video games, television, movies, comics, anime, and so forth. What’s your huckleberry?
Honestly, TV. It is the only one I can do, while doing something else. Unless that shit has subtitles, then I’m screwed all over again. I have a pretty hectic work schedule for the majority of the year. So it has become key to multitask. I can’t devote 100% of my attention to much. TV is the easiest to enjoy without the guilt of overindulging.
Would you classify yourself as a geek?
Oh lord. I know how people can get with this. But yeah, I would. I’m sure there are specific levels to that title. However, I don’t feel wrong for claiming it.
I mean I had an unhealthy addiction to most things Marvel as a child. Saturday morning cartoons, a shit ton of trading cards. Spent many a weekday at local comic shops poking at the action figures. Then when I hit middle school I was super into anime. Sailor Moon was my main vice. But I would rent random VHS from the same comic shop. Ranma 1/2, Fatal Fury. Stuff like that. Then I was always playing on the PlayStation at home. WHICH we only got once my brother was old enough to play. Really dad, sexist much? I hogged that shit though because I was bigger than the little bro. So yeah, I stand by my geek status.
Okay, then. New Lara, or old Lara?
We talking old Lara with square boobs? or newer so that she looks human, with BIG boobs?
Umm… okay lemme rephrase that. Reboot Lara, Previous Lara, or Square Boob Lara?
I liked her before. I mean, I don’t get why they felt the need to change her. Feels like they want to make me feel bad for thinking busty chicks can kick ass. Isn’t that what sports bras are for? I don’t get the PC crap. She was hot then, she’s hot now. Who cares what her bust size was? I’ll be honest, I didn’t even notice until someone brought it up in conversation.
Riddle me this, Batman and the Joker are finally settling their differences, once and for all, over a best-of-three match of Snooker and two cases of Mike’s Hard Lemonade. What song is playing on the jukebox?
WTF? Snooker? Why wouldn’t they just play pool? This is AMERICA!
JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION.
Aside from the fact that in no DC universe could I see this happening because the Joker is a nut case…
So you’re saying it would be the Pina Colada Song? Okay, we’ll go with the Pina Colada Song.
The Beginning Is the End Is the Beginning. Smashing Pumpkins
Smashing Pumpkins? Really? How are we friends?
That’s what you get for asking such a ludicrous question!
Sigh, okay. Moving on, who–
Besides, it was a bar that had Snooker instead of pool and served Mike’s. What did you expect?
MOVING ON… who or what is your favorite character ever?
That is another ridiculous question! Ugh…Can I name female and male? I’m just going to. I don’t need your permission!
Sure, why not. Who needs a format?
I’m just going to stay within the realm of comics. Because there is no way to narrow down my favorite character of all time from every aspect of pop culture. I’d die.
Okay.
Rogue for sure. She’s southern and her power is so tragic I just love it. absolutely hated the way she was portrayed in the X-Men films.NOTHING like the powerful woman I grew up idolizing. A whiny bitch that couldn’t even protect herself. I hope they take another stab at that like they did with Deadpool. Jesus what a disaster that first attempt was as well.
And although I know I will get shit about it… Wolverine. Look, there is a reason why they made a zillion movies with him as the feature. That character is awesome. He’s got the edge we love, with that soccer mom vibe that pops up whenever he is helping Jubilee out. I love that his power makes him hard to kill, but his skeleton makes him Magneto’s bitch. Not to mention that love triangle. I’m a girl. I can’t help it.
And also Hugh Jackman with mutton chops.
What a great casting that was.
-and neck veins.
all those things!
So Cherry, this is wrapping up our interview, but I just conducted a nude, in-game photo shoot after discovering a glitch in Far Cry 5, and then wrote about it, including photos from said virtual photo shoot. This is the kind of high quality journalism that is expected here at XPN Junkie. Do you feel you are up to the task?
I do all my best writing while nude.
As do I. It’s the only way to do it, really.
So yeah, I can handle it. My job hours are about to decrease significantly. Not to mention all the badass movies and games I’ve gotta catch-up with. Should be no shortage of things to write about!
Would you say podcasting possibilities are in the future?
Why not? The public needs to experience the musical tone that is my speaking voice.
It melts butter, I’m sure. Well that’ll do it for our interview. You can catch up with Cherry right here on XPN Junkie every Wednesday at 11:30 PM.
What?! There’s no way I can be on here every Wed–
I’d like to thank Cherry for taking some time to have a chat with me tonight. Be sure to check out her regular write-ups right here on XPN Junkie. Until next time!
